One of my very first posts (if not, the very first) was about change. Well, change is once again upon us, and in a big exciting way! But more on change in a minute, first I need to update on Molly's big changes, since I haven't done that in about two months!
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First of all, yes, every one of these pictures is from instagram. Yes I am obsessed with instagram. Yes, my camera is annoying to use all of the time. Yes, I have stopped caring that majority of my family pictures come from my phone. Yes, I am slowly improving some of my crazy. Bear with me :)
Little Molly is now 14 months old and very much a toddler. She is walking, running, dancing, talking, and so much more! I am absolutely loving this stage as her personality comes out more and more.
She is still t.i.n.y. Seriously, she is only 19 pounds, but she is tall. She has always been tall and thin, I hope she is blessed with that her whole life. Being less than 20lbs does mean that her car seat still faces backwards in the car. She doesn't seem to mind most of the time. Give her some music and a toy and a short drive, and she will be mostly happy.
This is probably the best smile you will ever see in your entire life. Just sayin'.
Messy, messy, messy.
She loves to play outside, especially if there is water. We have recently started to take swim lessons at FINS and we are loving it! She is learning all about safety and how to swim back to the wall. She loves to swim underwater and kick her legs!
In case you can't tell, I am c.r.a.z.y about this child.
She will frequently help herself to a snack from the garden...but she seems to like the green tomatoes better than the ripe red ones. Strange.
She is starting to like to color on paper. She did this one with her great-grandma, Nana, while I went shopping...I mean, to study.
She loves to push her stroller around the house. She now has her own little stroller for her babies that she LOVES.
She has so many favorite books, but "Where's Spot" is definitely one of them. I taught her how to tuck her babies into bed and then she reads to them.
The kissy fish face is one of her newest faces that she makes...along with her super grouchy face that I haven't been able to get a picture of yet.
She is still a really good eater for the most part. She is getting a little pickier, but what she cares to eat changes by the day, so I'm not concerned. She will always eat fruit though.
We picked these awesome glasses up at Target for $1 on one of our many excursions. They provided wild entertainment for about an hour! She loved taking them on and off and checking out her reflection in the oven door. Crazy cute.
Every day after her nap, she sits in my lap and has a sippy cup of milk while we watch Barney (thank you DVR). It has been a great way to transition from nap time to play time.
Oh the little bikini..I swore I would never buy my daughter a bikini. And then she outgrew this years one piece suit after only a couple of wears because she is super tall for her age. So, we moved on to a two piece that is a size too big. But I have to admit that I am loving her pudgy kissable tummy sticking out! And as an added bonus, it makes swim diaper changes sooooo much easier. I think she may be in a bikini at least until she is potty trained :)
She is really into sunglasses right now. Probably because I wear them every time I am outside. 90% of the time she puts them on they are upside down! Here, we were hanging out on the porch of our new favorite Mexican food restaurant, Ciscos. Rancho will still always be a family fav though.
Being goofy while we play in her room. She kept trying to put her headband on her head.
I am in love with every new stage that she moves into. Each new stage is always my current favorite. She has a crazy sponge of a brain that soaks up everything she encounters. Just today she learned to stomp her feet to the song "If You're Happy and You Know It" (she already clapped her hands).
She is using a lot of sign language and learns a new sign every couple of weeks. She knows eat, drink, diaper, more, all-done. Of course, that is on top of all the verbal words she says, which is too many to list here now. She has been learning her animal sounds too. She knows puppy sounds, monkey sounds, and birdie sounds and can point them all out in books, along with bunnies.
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Now let's talk about some awesome changes our family is working on. First, the most obvious change is the name and design of the blog. So let's talk about the name: Juniebug Love.
A couple of people have recently asked me about Molly's middle name. The invitation to Molly's first birthday party said "Molly June." Her birth certificate says Molly Sophia May Rooks. So, what's the deal? The deal is that Austin and I were in a bad place when we had to make the final decision on her name a couple of weeks before her birth.
Sophie was our first girl name of choice, until I decided before our 20 week ultrasound that it was becoming too common. We immediately agreed on Molly. We talked about a couple of middle names including Sophia and June. June was Austin's stepfather's (Randy) mother's name. I never knew her but I have heard wonderful stories about her. Long story short, I settled when naming her because at the time, I insisted on her having my maiden name in her name because I had no idea what was going to happen with Austin and I at the time. For that matter, I couldn't even promise if he was going to be in our lives at all. And obviously, the name Molly June would't work if my maiden name, May, was in her name. However, I was afraid that naming her that would always be a reminder of what was going on with our marriage at that time, and it has been exactly that, at least for me.
But, Austin is in our life. He is an amazing and dedicated father. He was there for her birth and has driven to see her roughly twice a month. He loves her more than life itself. To me, Molly has never been Molly Sophia, she has always been Molly June. Randy passed away about two months before Molly was born, and it is nice that she has his mother's name in hers. Austin has been on me to officially change it, and I will. He wanted it done before her first birthday, but that has not happened. It needs to soon.
As for the name of the blog, I often call Molly my Junebug or my Juniebug. I think it is cute and we make a song out of it. It goes "Molly June, Molly June, Molly Junie Juniebug." She is my little Molly June. Molly Juniebug. My Juniebug Love.
As for the appearance of the blog. Well, I think it's way cuter. More subtle. More simple. More my style. But my style changes...often, so I'm sure this will too. I'm trying to embrace that. Also, I keep saying that this blog will be more one day. A place to document family recipes, a place photos to be shared, a place for daily anecdotes and rants, a place for someone to see the crafts that I might actually attempt one day that I keep filing away in my head (read: pinterest). Maybe one day my blog will be all of that. Maybe not. Right now, all I have been able to handle is a post once a month if I'm lucky. For the record, I did post about Molly's first birthday party and Easter over on my photography blog if you missed those and want to see them...maybe I'll get around to creating posts over here for them.
This also brings me to our second big change: Austin has not only decided to leave Blizzard and move to the Tomball area, but he already secured a job with Apple as an Apple Care Advisor. He starts with Apple on June 11th and will be moving to Tomball this week! He is so excited to be close to Molly and watch her grow up. He is also excited at the prospect of being a part-time stay-at-home-dad because he will be working from home. It all depends on his schedule though.
So to answer the question on everyone's mind. No, we are not moving back in together. No, we still don't know if we are going to be staying married or getting divorced. This move does mean a lot to us though. It makes us excited and nervous all at once. Living close to each other does inevitably mean spending more time together. Regardless of what happens, we realize that something does need to happen. This move is a big change and a big deal. We pray that with this change comes the clarity as to which direction we need to head.
Now, that I have that discussion taken care of, let me tell you about a couple of minor changes that I am facing personally. First off, I have decided to mostly quit photography. I had a good run. I stayed busy, I improved my craft, I defined my style, and I learned a lot. However, it kept me too busy. I was spending all of the little bit of spare time I had working on either editing or business. My grades were suffering, I was not being the mother that I want to be, I was disorganized and feeling crazy, I got little sleep, and I was starting to loathe it.
After a lot of prayer and meditation, I came to the conclusion that this was not the time for it. I got into photography because of Molly and I wanted it to stay about her. Probably the absolute biggest realization I had is that above anything else in this world, I want to be a mother. And I want to give motherhood my absolute everything. It has been the one thing I knew I wanted to do with my life since I was a little girl. I will be a mother for the rest of my life, true, but I will only be the mother of Molly as a toddler once. I am not even promised another child in this lifetime. One day, she will be in school, one day she will spend more time than I want her to with friends, one day she will move away. Those will be the seasons of my life that I will need to fill my time with other things, maybe I will do photography then. Now, I am her Momma. Every second of every day. This is what I am meant to do. This feels good. This feels right.
I am truly at peace with this decision. The past couple weeks, I have had time off between classes and I have thoroughly enjoyed not having anything else to do. Usually when I have time off of school, I spend it doing something with photography. Not anymore. Now I can spend it on things that don't make me feel crazy. Things that make me feel like I have control over my life. Like, cleaning out my closet...or maybe even reading a book! It is making me look forward to finishing my degree and to start teaching. As long as I am teaching I will be promised three amazing months to spend by the pool with Molly and time off at Christmas to bake cookies and look at twinkling lights. I am getting really excited.
And that brings me to the final change. Although, it still won't be for another couple of months, I will be finally GRADUATING!! Two days after Austin starts his new job, I will be starting my final semester of school. For eight more weeks, I will be taking 9 hours online. Then in August, I will walk across that stage in Beaumont and receive my degree in Applied Arts and Sciences. Unfortunately, because of a bunch of details I won't bore you with, I will not be graduating with my teaching certificate. I will be getting my alternative certificate through Region IV. Due to the start and end dates, the whole process will take roughly another school year. However, for most of that year, I will be able to start substituting, which I have already applied to do at Conroe ISD, at least until I start my student teaching. I should be starting that in September, when Molly starts going to JOY school.
Okay, that was a lot of information, I know. Thank you for hanging in this long! But hopefully I have cleared up some, if not most, of the questions a lot of people have been wondering. And I guess I just want to say, that I want you to always feel like you can ask me. Am I an open book? Not necessarily. I share what I want to share and what I am comfortable sharing. Although I share a lot, there is still a lot that is only mine. But, if you ask, I will share with you what I want, as little or as much as that may be. I know there is a lot going on in our lives. I know there is a lot of things that people don't understand. I don't even understand everything all of the time. But I'm figuring it out in the best way I know how.
I so much appreciate the support and understanding that I have received from friends and family and I want you to know that it means the world to me. I am truly blessed to have so many wonderful and caring people in my life.
